dear customer,

we have recieved a request to cancel your ***** broadband service. the cancellation will take place 30 days from today.

blah blah, etc etc…..

????? do fucking what now?

since when do people have the power to ask other companies to do such things?

B.T. (for it is they) cut our phone line by mistake. and as an added bonus they asked my I.P. to end my broadband contract!

the full story. settle in.

a few weeks back i recieved a phone call from B.T. asking if we’d be interested in four months free phone usage. no call charges, no line rental, nothing. zip. nada. of course, being a yorkshireman i jumped at the chance. “owt for nowt and in wi t’barrow” as we say round these parts.

then comes last week….and the enemy picks the phone up to ring her mum. dead. no ring tone.

the next day i get the above e-mail. wifey rings B.T. (from her mobile).

“why are we cut off?”

“unpaid direct debits”

“what unpaid direct debits?”

“your monthly payment hasn’t been paid”

“what payment? we are on four months free!!!”

“er…no…you aren’t and owe us £**.**”


“we have tried repeatedly to take the funds, but according to your bank the direct debits have been stopped”

“well of course they have, we are on four months free!”

“er, no.”

“so what do we owe?”


“and if we pay that, we get re-connected?”


“ok…but what about the four months we are supposed to be getting free?”

“i know nothing about that”

“ok, so it’s £**.**?”


“right, i’ll pay it by card now”

“and theres the £***.** re-connection fee”

“?!?!?!?!?!?”……..cue sound of mobile being turned off!

as i say, i got the e-mail. 30 days? thats cool, we can sort it out in that time. apart from…NO!!! WTF??? the next day my net was off!

i rang my I.P. people. asked why it had been turned off. turns out bt asked them to do it. i asked what happened to the supposed 30 days, and how they could do what B.T. asked, when surely it’s a binding contract between myself and them, not B.T.. thepoor guy at the other end of the line had no answer, and i probably shouldn’t have sworn at him like i did!

in the meantime the enemy managed to talk to someone with a bit more nouse at B.T. and solve the problem…apparently we shouldn’t have been cut off like that. but we were also never put on the four months free thing either! and as such, our bill wasn’t getting paid! gits.

so here i am now, waiting. cos it’ll take around 7-10n days to turn my broadband service back on. which will mean around thursday.

i’m away on union stuff til wednesday, so it aint all bad. but i’ll not be doing any breakfast radio shows…..and thankfully it’s spiders sunday, so thats a good bit of luck too.

see you on the other side.

(this was published thanks to my wonderful 3 mobile broadband dongle)




2 responses to “BLOODY TERRIBLE

  1. BT did some’at similar to me many moons ago. At the time they had offices in Staines so I went down and ‘tailgated’ a bloke through the security door, found a managers office and locked me and him in until it was sorted.

    Even got a £50 gift voucher on my way out by way of an apology.

    Enjoy the union stuff old bean. It can be a real adventure in various pubs for important talks….;-)

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