PAPER SMILE

seventeen times
only one
little suprise
the chosen
never wonder
never suprised
never change
always broken
ones feelings
never respected
total compliance
is expected
tick tock
sub plot
stopped clock
mind rot.

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DIDN’T WE HAVE A GOOD TIME?

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it is with a heavy heart and bitter-sweet emotions i have to announce that, as from 7am saturday 2nd april i will no longer be employed at what i have always refered to as “the paid job”.
i’ve never NOT said i work for tesco, just never made a big deal of it. i am not ashamed of working for them. i won’t deny that some of the decisions of the company are at odds with my politics, but i much prefer to keep work and home/social/political life totally exclusive. now i am nothing near daft enough to think that such issues that cause upset are decided at store level. so as such, morally i have no issue working for them. that and the fact that i have for nigh on TWENTY EIGHT YEARS, since i was a nipper.
anyway, back to the point.
as you may have seen recently in the news, around 75 or so stores are to cease 24 hour trading. unfortunately ours is on that list. as such, my job role is no more. i have been offered other position in our store and at other stores, but sadly no full time positions are available at this time. (like most retailers these days it seems full time jobs don’t exist).
another option was redundancy.
now with 28 years behind me as well as my age you can imagine the package offered was very decent. for all the constant slagging off the company gets, in the main, they DO know how to treat staff. they looked after me fourteen years ago when i had my accident and was off for 12 months.
myself and The Enemy have spent the last few weeks talking it all through (talking about bugger all else to be fair) and we decided that redundancy was the way to go. and so it is. i have six weeks left. then for the first time since leaving school i will be jobless.
i have plans. i won’t become a man of leisure just yet. but i AM having a good few weeks off. going to spend the quality time with The Enemy and Boy that i have missed by being on nights for the last 10 years, and get used to daylight again. also crack on with the handful of poems i have started and stalled on. maybe even finally learn to play my melodica (and if allowed, buy a trombone and learn that)
so there you have it. it’s official now and i wanted you all to know. if i have seemed distant and not entirely fun in the last month, this may go some way to explaining it. i apologise to anyone who may feel i have been ignoring them, i swear i meant nothing personal by it. also apologise for the lack of radio shows. that too shall be addressed very soon.
anyone who needs a loyal, trustworthy, fun employee from may onwards, speak up. i’ll be available.
for now though, i’ll end by saying thank you to tesco for employing me for almost three decades, the many friends that i have made along the way and the decent customers who managed to NOT insult or threaten me.
ttfn
Sime.

JUST WHEN THEY THOUGHT IT COULDN’T GET WORSE

reading about “call me dave” and his trip up to yorkshire, i’ve written another little poem.

camwellies

 

they were up to their waists in water and sludge, by god they were having it rough.
he came in his wellies, the much cheaper ones, so that he didn’t seem as much of a toff.
the last thing they needed was his gurning mug, looking concerned for the massed rank of cameras.,
looking concerned, shocked and amazed. like they all seem to do (lying wankers)
showing his *cough* humanitarian side, with the minister for floods in Barbados
cos, you know, it is christmas, he’s earnt that nice break, and quite frankly, he don’t give a toss.
old dave went to york, it was up to his ankles. any further he’d have needed some waders.
then he buggered off home, back down to the smoke, one of life’s greatest ever evaders.
the people up here, they’re made of strong stuff, they’ll face it, get through it together.
and probably say, with a grin on their faces, “tha what, dunt be soft lad, it’s just weather”.
but joking aside, let’s hope they’re ok, and the water it drains, moves elsewhere.
and fuck the politicians and their front page snap ops, we’ve proved again, it’s the people that care.

stay safe folks.

AN ODE TO BASIL MUSSOLINI

the platform doors open, and out you do fly
with a wave of the arm and a loud plaintive cry
you chase down the train as it starts to pull out
banging the windows like some sort of lout
the brakes lock on screeching, it jerks to a halt
the passengers glaring, they know its your fault
the carriage doors open you jump straight on in
we’re ready, the main show is about to begin
limbs they are flailing and voices are raised
can’t hear what’s being said but what a display
the ticket collector or guard (is that right?)
he’s not backing down, he’s up for the fight
next thing we know you are no longer on
with a roar of it’s engine, the train it is gone
and off you go again shouting and ranting
face turning purple sweating and panting
you look like John Cleese when he played Basil Fawlty
attacking his car with what looked like a small tree
turn on your heels, you go storming away
for those of us watching you’ve just made our day
so on behalf of us opposite on platform 2B
i say mate, doubt you’d have loved Mussolini!

OUT ON THE STREETS

i got a new ride this year. meet Pauline.

she is an AJS Modena.

i love her.

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here she is with my other love.

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she looks a bit different now. she’s had a fly screen

paulinescreen

and a few vinyls put on.

pauline panel

 

we’ve been getting about a bit now that the good weather is here

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even managed to get out for a 200 mile run with my old friend Dave, aka Old Fart last weekend for the first time in about three years.

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which was a perfect warm up for the 117 mile run to Scooter & Ska Rally this coming weekend. she’ll be fully loaded!

paulinefullyloaded

i’ll let you know how that goes.

ttfn. sime.

BUT I’M DIFFERENT NOW

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SO I HAVEN’T BEEN HERE SINCE LAST JUNE…..

i have decided to start to blog again. not sure why, just a feeling. may be that it will be cathartic to do so. i figured if i need to vent, better here instead of at home.

so much has happened since, some good, some bad. i’ll let you in on a few of the good things. the bad ones can stay away.

the dj-ing lark has gone beyond my wildest dreams. do the radio still, trying to get back into doing a weekly wednesday morning show. i have done a few, it’s ok when i am sat there, it’s just the getting to the sitting there part. i am the same when it comes to doing owt around the house. takes me forever to start, but when i do i can’t stop.

the live dj-ing is another thing altogether. last time i was here i was about to play at the first Santa Pod “Back With Mods” Scooter & Ska Rally. it could not have gone better. the selecter, bad manners, small fakers, and many more played to a big crowd.

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my sets went down well too, to the extent that i was asked to play this years, and i am already booked for NEXT YEAR too.

but back to this year….

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once again i have the honour of being on the main stage for the whole of friday afternoon, and then between the bands on the saturday afternoon.

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also, this year i am going down on two wheels. NEW two wheels. i still have Emily the PX but she now has a sister.

meet Pauline the AJS MODENA

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not only am i riding her there, but she is going into the custom show too!

the enemy and the boy will be there too. they really enjoyed it last year. look! smiles all round!

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the enemy wearing my parka!

what else?

oh yes, i was guest dj at the sheffield quadrophenia night, i have done more Rock & Roll Lounge gigs (every time i play it as one of the RARL djs) played my hometown, been support dj for a gig where Substitute and The Small Fakers were playing.

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was asked to dj at the north london leg of march of the mods

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and as such Rock & Roll Lounge are now hosting the Sheffield leg in 2015.

erm….

me and the boy have had season tickets fro the super reds down at oakwell. loved every single minute of having him at the side of me. taught him some new words pmsl, and we’ve been toa few local away matches also. highlight for me had to be after our (extremely unfair) loss to the our nearest rivals down the road he mturned to me, tears in his eyes and said 2you know what dad, forget man utd, it’s barnsley all the way for me now”. so proud. we looked a bit happier earlier in the day.

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but no, it’s been an absolute joy to go to the games with him. and despite the fact that, as i write this, it looks like we will be relegated in two weeks, he has already affirmed his wish to renew his season ticket. top lad.

i channelled my inner Phill Jupitus too this year

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uncanny huh?

i co-wrote a song! oh yes, that is true. an off the cuff remark to a local legend and musician Scott Doonican had me penning lyrics and next thing there it was! a song dedicated to the rather special toilets behind the old west stand at oakwell (also the name of the new fanzine for BFC)

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take a look HERE and maybe download the single. it’s all for charity….

also helped fund a Bar Steward Sons Of Val Doonican lp, which in turn got my name on it!

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bought some records…. LOTS of records. i’m a self confessed vinyl junkie

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there was one more thing…. now what was it?

oh aye, got a text from a certain Mr A. Lewis and asked if i’d like to go backstage at Paul Weller’s Manchester Apollo gig and finally meet him and have a drink (Andy, not PW).

well i aint going to turn that down, especially as we have chatted for the last few years yet never actually met face to face.

so we finally did. (forgive the pic, it was taken on a dodgy phone by the enemy)

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a true gentleman, and a pleasure to get to chat and share a bottle of red.

so yeah. thats about it. pretty much up to date.

been a long un today. the rest probably won’t be. but i promise i shall try to write more.

honest.

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for now,

ttfn

sime